ovarian cancer

My RAOK Continue

Just stopping by quickly to say that I am still delivering my random acts of kindness! I have done only a few over the past couple of months (and forgotten to blog about them 🙈) but today I delivered four! Number one went to our London air bnb host – a wonderful, beautiful soul who just this week discovered they had a tumour. I remember the feeling well from my own diagnosis 2.5 years ago; the ‘new normal’ as you adjust to a situation you thought happened to ‘other people’. Actually I’d already decided I was going to leave him a random act of kindness before he revealed his news but sharing our stories cemented my plan and I left the envelope containing £20 in his bathroom.

Then, as we left the apartment I took the other three envelopes I was carrying (each also containing £20) and slipped them into random letter boxes belonging to his neighbours – I used my intuition to select no 3, 13 and 18. The trill of these random acts still fills me with so much joy as I imagine the recipient’s response to a random cash surprise 💖 after we left we went to kingscross to make our way back home and my hubby stopped at @pretamangeruk for a coffee which the barista gave to him for FREE!…it turns out Pret do random acts of kindness too! I love me some kindness ripples! 💜🌈🙌🏼 for those of you who don’t know why I hand out envelopes containing £20…it’s because following my surgery for stage four ovarian cancer in 2016 my friends and family raised £500 for me to treat myself…instead I’ve been handing the money out to strangers in a bid to make the world a little bit smilier. The pot of money keeps growing through donations and I keep on handing out the envelopes. It’s been AMAZING!…with so many wonderful stories and ripples…check out for more. #kindness #raok #randomactaofkindess #bekind #fimunro #london #cancer #kindesscures #kindess #kind #passiton #love #makethedaygood

ovarian cancer

French Hospital

So, hubby and I escaped to the south of France for a rest for two weeks – which reminds me, I will write a blog post soon about how I travel super cheap and tips for traveling with cancer. We are currently traveling home by train after what can only be described as an ‘eventful’ trip!

The two day train journey involved me sitting on various train toilet floors as I constantly vomited; by the time we arrived in France I was weak and dehydrated, unable to even keep water down. Unsurprisingly I ended up in hospital on the third day after I fell asleep (passed out) with my head down a toilet – what can I say, I’m super classy! 😂

Hospital in France was ‘intersting’ with them not allowing my hubby to be with me for the first 6 hours; them striping me topless in a room with about 25 other people so they could do an ECG; them hooking up fluids and forgetting to start them – then when they did start them, forgetting to change the bag which resulted in my blood running back into the bag 😂🙈 I laugh now but it wasn’t fun at the time. The hardest part was getting them to understand my diagnosis – they couldn’t understand that I have late stage cancer because of how well I look 🤦🏼‍♀️ Blood tests showed that I had an infection and, with the help of antibiotics, I was soon feeling better again.

After that adventure we had a lovely holiday of sunshine, beaches, lots of walking and eating my weight in fish! Delicious! The picture is taken by my hubby on an island off the coast of Marseille.

I am still very tired from being so poorly and, due to the crazy heat wave in France during our trip (40+deg during day and 35+deg overnight) my body is still recovering.

I will be properly back online next week, when I will reply to the many messages I’ve received, but I will be quieter than usual as I regain my strength.

For those of you who missed out on a place on my August event, I plan to run TWO events in September. Dates to be confirmed 💜

Love and light, Fi xxx

ovarian cancer

New Event Date Added

**This will be the second time that I run this event after the huge success of the first event in July!**

Are you feeling burnt out? Overworked? Exhausted? Deflated? Stressed?

Are you facing a major transition in your life?

Are you seeking a life that aligns with your soul’s purpose?

If you answered yes to any of the above then you are in the right place!

Who Am I?

I am Fi Munro (PhD) and I have been where you are.

I used to always be busy, stressed and trying to please everyone. That is, until I got sick…in January 2016 I was diagnosed with stage four cancer and since then I have dedicated my life to understanding everything I can about returning my mind, body and spirit back to wholeness. I now use my training* and personal experience to help others begin their life changing journeys too.

Using my background as a PhD reseracher and my skills and training in reiki, yoga, crystal therapy, meditation and more, I now work as a Spiritual Life Coach and Intuitive Mentor, here to guide you to live a life in accordance with your core values and deepest desires.

Recent feedback from my ‘Journey Back to Wholeness Event”

“Hi Fi, I just wanted to thank you so much for such a wonderful day on Monday. It was a really lovely day and so nice of you to welcome us into your home.
I know you wanted some feedback and I have been trying to think of anything helpful to say to you, however I think you pretty much nailed it! The activities were deep and helpful and flowed well from one to another but also with enough break time for reflection and integration. I hope you will do lots more as this work is so needed….Thank you so much for your time and the crystals and everything! I am glad to have found you and I will definitely be back for more of your workshops for me and my children too.”

What Does the Day Look Like?

Join me for a day long event were I will help you, alongside five other people, to move forward as you transcend any previous limits and tap into your higher purpose. Helping you to both discover and, more importantly, learn to love your true self, I will be on hand to guide and support you as you transition into the best version of yourself and begin your own personal journey back to wholeness.

Using reiki, crystal therapy, intuitive mentoring, breathwork, meditation, sound baths and more you will take the first steps to let go of old patterns and behaviours that no longer serve you as you learn how to help heal your mind, body and spirit.

We will spend the morning together in a safe and welcoming space in my garden room where you will recieve the benefits of breath work; reiki; meditation and deep spiritual connections. As this event takes place in the days leading up to a full moon, we will also perform ‘full moon rituals’ to release that which no longer serves you during fire ceremonies in my tree filled garden. Then, I will support you to begin to take the steps needed to manifest the changes your heart and soul desire.

You will then have the opportunity to enjoy lunch in my home or garden; you can chose to sit at a table under the trees; on a stone bench beside my pond; on a wooden bench amongst my roses or in my large country kitchen or garden room.

After lunch we will move into my treatment room where you can enjoy a deep relaxing meditation and sound bath followed by a crystal healing.

There are plenty of breaks and sharing circles throughout the day ensuring that you will leave feeling deeply refreshed, relaxed and, above all, supported.

Please find more information about how I work on my website:


What to Bring

• Packed lunch and snacks

• Water bottle

• Blanket

• Cushion

• Notebook

• Pen

A Recent Client Testimony

“Dearest Fi, I do not know how to convey what a wondrous experience I had with you. I had no idea what to expect – but you blew me away. I have had such a sense of calm all day since I saw you. A feeling of ‘all will be well’. So much I have learned from you. You are exceptionally talented – what did I look for – insight and perspective. Oh yes – and I got a lot more besides. I can’t thank you enough – you’re precious!!”

2 hour ‘Love and Light Therapy’ Session, June 2018

My Qualifications and Training

• 2018 85hr Pregnancy Yoga Teacher Training (due for completion September 2018)

• 2018 VISIONARY PRACTITIONER TRAINING YR 1 (due for completion 2019)

• 2018 Cherish Crystal Healing Level 2 Practitioner

• 2018 Reiki Second Degree

• 2017 Cherish Crystal Healing Level 1

• 2017 Reiki First Degree

• 2017 Hatha Raja Yoga

• 2017 Little Greene Yoga Foundation Teacher Certification (Children’s Yoga)

• 2015 Hypnotherapy and Psychotherapy Training (not completed due to caver diagnosis)

• 2011 PhD in Children’s Outdoor Play and Leaning

• 2008 Bsc Hons

What I Have Helped My Clients with Recently

My clients come to me for a range of reasons, but usually because they have reached a point of transition in their life that has left them feeling unfulfilled, uninspired or trapped.

Some recent examples of reasons clients have found me are listed below:

• Feelings of depression

• Feeling anxious

• Feeling unfulfilled in their career

• Exhaustion

• Stress

• Feeling like a victim in their own lives

• Trouble moving forward in their lives

• Feeling unable to align their life with their dreams

• Struggling to maintain healthy boundaries

• Fells of being burnt out

• Seeking a more meaningful life

• Adjusting to life after a breakup

• Adjusting to life after an illness

• Relationship problems

• Trouble sleeping

• Support through cancer treatment

• Self-doubt

• Problems that are repeating themselves over and over again

I look forward to welcoming you.


Love and light, Fi xx

ovarian cancer



Only 3 places remaining.

Monday 23rd July


£60 per person.

Advance booking essential.

Message to book 💙

Are you feeling burnt out? Overworked? Exhausted? Deflated? Stressed?

Are you facing a major transition in your life?

Are you seeking a life that aligns with your soul’s purpose?

If you answered yes to any of the above then you are in the right place!

I am Fi Munro (PhD) and as a Spiritual Life Coach and Intuitive Mentor, I am here to guide you to live a life in accordance with your core values and deepest desires.

Using my skills in a wide range of therapies, I develop tailored sessions to help you to move forward as you transcend any previous limits and tap into your higher purpose. Helping you to both discover and, more importantly, learn to love your true self, I am here to guide and support you as you transition into the best version of yourself.

Join me for a day long event were we will work together in a safe space, alongside five other people to guide you on your journey back to wholeness.

Using reiki, crystal therapy, intuitive mentoring, breathwork, meditation, sound baths and more I will guide you to take the first steps to let go of old patterns and behaviours that no longer serve you as you learn how to help heal your mind, body and spirit.

This event takes place in the days leading up to a full moon and lunar eclipse (the longest this centuary), creating abundant universal energy for us to work with as you (re)connect with nature and perform ‘full moon rituals’ to release that which no longer serves you from your life and begin to take the steps to manifest the changes your heart and soul desire.

If you are ready to take the first steps, then I am ready to guide you.

Love and light, Fi xx

Things to bring:

Packed lunch and snacks

Water bottle





Please find more information about how I work on my website:

ovarian cancer

Remission is not the aim…life is

This weekend I had the joyful experience of not only attending Trew Fields Festival in Surrey, but standing on the stage as one of the event speakers.

Trew Fields Festival was set up by Sophie Trew, an incredible woman and fellow cancer warrior who wants to make a difference in the ‘cancer community’ by highlighting the many ways in which our bodies can heal holistically alongside our minds and spirits.

The festival runs over two days during which there are many speakers ranging from stage four cancer thrives, to doctors, health specialists and so on. There are also workshops on yoga, breathing, diets, medicinal mushrooms and even ice baths. There is live music and dancing until the early hours each night and above all there is so much joy.

Sophie and I did a short video together the week before the festival which covers some of the stuff I discussed on stage.

The festival isn’t large and I hope it never is because this is part of it’s charm and magic. The friend I went down with (who isn’t a cancer warrior by the way!) commented that it was like a family wedding and that is a perfect description. It was fun and happy and intimate and over the course of the weekend the people I met became more than just friends, they became my cancer family, my tribe.

This incredible woman is 59 and LIVING with stage four breast cancer!

Throughout the weekend I heard so many stories as everyone shared their own journey. It wasn’t just the talks on stage that fascinated me, but the chance meetings under the oak tree or lying in the field, or the circle of women that formed in the circus tent after my talk. In all of these encounters I was emotionally moved and recharged as we shared and offered hope to one another.

Love your scars!

The magic and energy of the whole weekend was palpable. I can’t have slept more than 10 hours over the four days but I was high on life, dancing and jumping about, buzzing with energy as I engaged with so many powerful people.

Then, at one point I made a sudden revelation…

These people that I danced with, shared stories with, laughed and joked with; these people so full of energy and life were walking contradictions. Nearly every single person I met had stage four (or similarly late stage) cancer; like me, they had heard the words ‘inoperable’, ‘incurable’, ‘terminal’ and yet here they were FILLED with energy, vitality and an infectious vest for life.

There was no sadness, no doom nor gloom. There was only life: vibrant, beautiful, abundant life.

These people, my fellow warriors, my cancer family and community, had not been cured by some magic protocol, many had never even been in remission, but they had been touched by death and with it they had felt the magic and wonder of life. They had all chosen to LIVE.

Many had, in fact, lived for years with stage four cancer. I met more than one who had lived over 10 years with stage four cancer and even an incredible woman with stage four ovarian cancer (same as me) who has lived 28 years following her diagnosis! AND during that time she had trained as a doctor and naturopath so that she is not only the best informed for her care but also so that she can help others too.

As I sat on the grass with this woman who 28 years previously, at the age of 19, had heard the same words as me and chosen to live instead of die, she told me:

“I’ve never been in remission. I do not hate or fight my cancer. I made friends with it and it taught me how to live.” I couldn’t agree more I thought as I realised I had found a unicorn. I was sitting face to face with the very thing I had been told didn’t exist. A stage four cancer warrior with OVARIAN CANCER that has been alive for nearly three decades and who looks healthier than most of the people you see walking down the street! “My cancer is like spiders in my home,” she went on. “I tell them they are fine to live here, but if they go in my bed I will kill them!”

The more people I connected with the more hope and joy I felt and I began to realise I startling truth: remission is not the aim, life is.

Us cancer warriors are often led to believe that we must attack our cancer; that we must hate it; fight it; cut, burn or poison it. We are led to accept that cancer is the end; that being made sick by treatment is the only (and best) option we have; that our diagnosis is the worse thing that will ever happen to us. But what if that weren’t true?

What if there were another way? What if we could live long, happy lives filled with hope if we let go of remission as the aim; if we learnt to live with our cancer; if we befriended it.

Look how healthy I am! Stage four cancer and THRIVING!

I still have cancer in my body. I chose not to have chemotherapy. I was told by some that this was selfish, wrong, naive and yet here I am living an awesome life. I have no pain, no weakness, no fatigue, no sadness. I have just travelled for 20 hours in four days, partied and danced, camped in a field, belly laughed and connected with some of the most amazing people I have ever met. I am living an incredible life not in spite of my cancer, but BECAUSE OF IT!

This weekend my talk was entitled ‘how cancer saved my life‘ and maybe if we all stopped fighting our cancer and instead befriended it; if we let it teach us the lessons it had for us; if if we stepped away from remission as the aim; maybe then it would save all of our lives.

I don’t know, but I do know one thing for sure: the people I met this weekend at Trew Fields Festival – the people that ‘should’ be dead, or ‘sick’ or in a hospice – were the most alive people I have ever met in my life and if that is what befriending cancer looks like then I would like to tell my cancer right now:

“I will not fight you, my aim is not to get rid of you. I will befriend you and, provided you don’t make a bed out of any of my vital organs, I am happy to learn your lessons, to walk and dance with you and to live a fucking amazing life. Thank you for saving my life.”

Imagine how cancer care would change if everyone – cancer warriors, oncologist, doctors, nurses, etc – went to a festival like Trew Fields and realised that cancer is not the end?

I was so inspired to LIVE after this weekend I signed up for a three year(!) training course to become a shaman! Boom! Life dream right there, happening BECAUSE OF CANCER!

Wishing you all a healing journey in which you can befriend and accept your own ‘spiders’.

Love and light, Fi xxx

health, holistic health, ovarian cancer

Anti-Cancer Protocol

So many of the messages I receive each day are questions about my ‘anti-cancer protocol’ and so I wanted to write it all down for you lovelies so that you can have a read and see if any of the things I do each day/week/month resonate with you as an option in your own lives.

Now, firstly, I want to be clear that, personally, I don’t use the term ‘anti-cancer’ because I am not concerned about the tumours in my body. Yes I may have multiple tumours resident in my physical form but I am still here and I am living a great life and, let’s be honest, evidence shows that before you get diagnosed with stage four cancer (like I have) you will have had tumours for up to 5 years(!) so I don’t see any point wasting my time worrying about how many of these guys I still have hanging around. No, instead it’s my ‘journey back to wholeness protocol’ or… my ‘living with cancer protocol’….or just ‘my protocol for life’. Of course, if it ever leads to no more cancer then that is FANTASTIC….but it is not my aim or focus. As I detailed in my book; I am all about healing rather than curing – healing is to become whole, whereas curing is to become free from disease.

So, now that we are clear about that I will detail broadly what I do every day and then go into more detail about what a typical day looks like.

Of course, in addition to my daily protocol I also receive a dose of Avastin every three weeks through Health Care at Home….to be clear, I take no other pharmaceuticals – not even pain relief because I feel no pain!…despite the cancer…


Protocol Overview

These are the things that I do every day without fail.

Vitamins (ordered through Amazon)

  • B12 1000mcg
  • Vit D3 20ug | Calcium 800mg | Magnesium 400mg
  • Vit C 1000mg
  • Zinc 15mg | Selenium 200mcg
  • Vit D3 25mcg | Vit K2 MK-4 100mcg
  • Co Enzyme Q10 300mg

Mushrooms (ordered from Dr Kate James)

With hot water as a tea:

  • Cordyceps Extract 3.4% Cordycepin 1 rounded tsp twice daily
  • Reishi Spore Powder 1 rounded tsp twice daily

Tablets (alternate weeks)

  • Changa Complex 3 per day and Reishi Spore Oil x 3 per day
  • Alternating with – Gynostemma x 3 per day


  • 1-2 hours walking in nature
  • 15 minutes dance
  • 15 mins yoga (minimum)


  • 15 min at start of day
  • 10-15 min meditation or self reiki at end of day

Food and Drink

  • Plant based (no meat – although I do eat fish)
  • No sugar (the majority of the time – I am only human after all)
  • Plenty of garlic, ginger, spices and herbs
  • 100% Organic at home (I do eat out though)
  • Minimum of 2litres of water per day – filtered with charcoal and crystals


Once a fortnight I will also have a therapy session with either a Shaman, a BodyTalk Practitioner or a Body Stress Release Practitioner. I have provided links to the ones I see. They are all exceptional and I highly recommend them…I see each one about once a month.

In addition I spend a lot of time doing the things I enjoy. I only work three days each week and I spend the rest of my time doing lots of walking, yoga, seeing family and friends, spending time with my hubby and generally having a fun, crazy time living my life and eating lots of food.

I avoid stress and I stand up for my boundaries and my values. I have no doubt that feeling constantly stressed and not speaking up for myself previously played a massive role in me getting so sick. Now I physically feel when I am getting stressed by life (or not being true to my values) and I have the tools to work through this to maintain my optimal health.


Now how do I fit all this in? you might be wondering?….let me show you…

I have chosen to detail a typical Tuesday for me as this is the day that I leave the house at 8.30/45am and so is most likely to reflect what a typical working day might look like for others.

I don’t know about you but I have read some other people’s protocols and thought ‘how do they have time to do anything else?!’ My protocol, however, is all about living your life and making the protocol work for you rather than it taking over.


Detailed Protocol

7am – get up. Take glass water bottles out the fridge – they have been in there overnight. Each has a charcoal block in it to filter the water. One has three smokey quartz crystals – to remove toxins. The other has an amethyst, a rose quartz and a clear quartz to create balance. I leave these on the work top to allow them to return to room temperature. I only use water from. These for the rest of the day – never tap water.

Shower, hair, makeup, dressed.

7.20am – kettle on.

Drink a glass of water (from one of the jugs) with a slice of lemon in it alongside my mushroom capsules that I order from Dr Kate James. Alternate weeks I take either 3 Changa Complex with 3 Reishi Spore Oil or 3 Gynostemma (everyone’s need are different so please seek a specialist if you wish to take mushrooms as some interfer with other medications).

7.30am – 15 minutes free dancing to drum based music. A personal favourite just now is Xavier Rudd. Amazing! This gets my body moving and stretching how it wants to, increases my heart rate and stimulate my lymphatic and nervous systems. Also, my mind gets completely lost in the music and movement – a brilliant ‘moving meditation’.

7.45am – use water from previously boiled kettle to make a mushroom tea using 1 rounded tsp Cordyceps Extract 3.4% Cordycepin and 1 rounded tsp Reishi Spore Powder. Delicious!

8.00am – 15 minute meditation, preferably done outdoors. This varies based on my mood or personal needs each day but is usually either a chanting meditation or a silent meditation. I end it with a silent thank you for everything I am grateful for that day.

8.15am – BREAKFAST! I make a smoothie using a large glass of water, two majool dates, a banana, raw cacao, chia seeds, bee pollen, ground flax seed, hemp oil, flax seed oil and either a pear, strawberries, blueberries, raspberries etc. To this I add two tablets containing Vit D3 20ug | Calcium 800mg | Magnesium 400mg. I blend this and drink this while taking the following additional supplements:

  • B12 1000mcg
  • Vit C 1000mg
  • Zinc 15mg | Selenium 200mcg
  • Vit D3 25mcg | Vit K2 MK-4 100mcg
  • Co Enzyme Q10 300mg

I don’t turn my phone on until at least one hour after I am up and never before my morning meditations….this is my time…not anyone else’s.

8.30/8.45am – I leave my house to teach a meditation class in Madoch Centre, St Madoes.

9.15-10.45am – teaching class

11.30am – I see my first client for the day. This can be for either reiki, crystals, one-to-one yoga or a collection of all of these.

1-2pm Lunch. This is usually onions plus a range of other vegetables (whatever is in season) cooked with curry powder and chilli and finished with plenty of raw garlic, ginger and chopped coriander. I serve this with pumpkin noodles and a whole avocado with a raw red onion and more coriander or mint – I go through A LOT of herbs each day.

2pm – in the afternoon I will see one or two clients depending on how long a session they book.

Depending on the pattern of my clients that day I will either go for a walk in the woods at lunch time or at the end of my working day.

6.15pm – I make a second mushroom tea using 1 rounded tsp Cordyceps Extract 3.4% Cordycepin and 1 rounded tsp Reishi Spore Powder. I drink this while waiting for dinner to finish cooking and will either meditate in the kitchen or give myself a mini self-reiki.

6.30pm – Dinner. This will always be plant based and cooked with spices, ginger, garlic and herbs. Occasionally (once a week) I will cook fish to go with dinner. I also get a takeaway once a week from Tabla which I enjoy with friends or my hubby (or all together!)

7.30-9.00pm – I attend a (newly discovered) Kundalini Yoga Class in Perth. I am currently building up my stamina so that I can alternate this with an amazing Ashtanga Class on a Wednesday Evening that I used to go to.

On other evenings I am either out seeing family or friends or cuddling up to my hubby on the sofa. I sometimes also run events or teach a yoga class depending on the day of the week.

Bedtime Routine – I turn my phone off an hour before I plan to go to bed (sometimes two hours). I never use my phone in the bedroom, instead I read and give myself a self reiki session before going to sleep.

I don’t have a TV in the bedroom – we have one in our house and it’s in the living room – I can think of nothing worse than watching a TV or using my phone in bed…talk about negative effect to your sleep!


I think protocols for optimal health can seem overwhelming when we are still caught up in the societal pressure of working ourselves into the ground at the expense of our physical, emotional and spiritual health. So, if you are looking at my protocols and thinking “that is way too much for me!” then don’t worry. I have a few top tips for getting you on the right path…

  • Take 15 minutes at the start of your day to do something for your mind, body and spirit:

Body – move for 5 minutes

Spirit – meditate or sit in silence for 5 minutes

Mind – journal for 5 minutes (try writing a list of things that you are grateful for)

Once you have a routine of doing this each morning you can start to add in a few other changes…try adding one a week or even one a month…

  • Go outside every day (yes even when it’s raining)
  • Take a few minutes during your day to just breath (nipping away to the loo for some privacy helps)
  • Drink more water
  • Eat more veggies
  • Stop being so hard on yourself
  • Leave your phone off until after your breakfast
  • Turn your phone off at night

It can also be really helpful to find a practitioner that can help you. This can be a therapist, councillor, yoga teacher, reiki practitioner, shamana…just as long as they make you feel comfortable and are able to hep guide and hold you as you begin to make positive changes in your life.

Above all, go easy on yourself and don’t judge yourself for ‘not doing what you are meant to’ – the fact that you are reading this post means that you have already taken the first step and you are ready to start making changes for you…

I hope this helps you on your journey back to wholeness.

Love and light, Fi xx

body image.

What do you mean ‘my bum looks big in this’?…

Since my stage four cancer diagnosis and the subsequent radical transformation of my body – including hair loss, an 18 inch scar, a colostomy bag and dramatic weight loss – I have become an advocate for promoting body confidence across social media, in my book and in magazine and news paper articles.Imagine my surprise (read *disgust*) then, when this weekend I went bridesmaid dress shopping with my two sisters (aka bride and fellow bridesmaid), my future brother in law’s sister (aka fellow bridesmaid or ‘adopted sister’) and my six year old niece only to discover that the majority of the dresses ‘off rack’ where in teeny tiny sizes!Now, I am a size ten woman who LOVES her body. I am a yoga teacher who exercises two hours a day (walking, yoga, dance) and who is, literally, missing half of her organs due to cancer surgery and yet only three…three!!…of the dresses fitted me without needing an extension added in the back and one of the dresses wouldn’t even go over my hips!My sister, on the other hand, is a gorgeous size 16 with curves in all the right places having birthed four children that I love the very bones of and not one single dress fit her.Now, out of the two of us, I would say that she has the most realistic female body given that more women have had children than lost organs…and so I would expect ‘off rack’ clothes to fit her.What kind of body image message is this giving to women when, on what should be a happy celebration of love and marriage, they are being told by clothes that their body is ‘wrong’?! How can it be acceptable that women should be made to feel ashamed of their bodies for being the ‘wrong’ shape? Especially when, I am missing half of my organs and I still couldn’t get into these tiny dresses!! Talk about unrealistic goals!…excuse me but I didn’t think we were still living in an age where we expected women to have body parts removed to create ‘social accepted’ tiny waists.I previously wrote a blog asking ‘where are the real role models?’…now I wonder ‘where are the real clothes?’Wouldn’t it be nice if there were clothes in the shops that fit ‘real’ women? Women that had created life, women that had scars and lumps and bumps. Women with curves. Sexy, bad ass women.How is it that today, in a world where we fight for female power, strength and confidence that we can’t even get clothes to fit us?I don’t know about you, but I refuse to be defined by a dress size label or to have someone else tell me what size or shape I ‘should’ be or what ‘perfect’ looks like.It’s time for a change.It’s time for a celebration of how freeking gorgeous we are, right now in this very moment.It’s time for retailers to realise that this is not good enough and, in fact, it’s not acceptable.Embrace your inner sexy, bad ass.Join me in this rebellion against being told what ‘perfect’ is and share this with a gorgeous woman in your life.Oh and, most important of all, remember that you are gorgeous, sexy and perfect right now!Love and light, Fi xxx

colaborative health care, health, holistic health

Holistic Dentistry… without the price tag

I wrote in my book ‘Love, Light and Mermaid Tails’ that I was keen to get my mercury fillings replaced for white fillings but that I wanted to have this done at a holistic dentist practice so that I wasn’t exposed to the mercury during the procedure. At the time the price per tooth was around £200 and, with eight black fillings in my mouth it seemed unlikely that I would be getting it done any time soon.

However, it still bothered me that I had these chemicals and heavy metals in my mouth and, potentially, in my blood stream and I was constantly in the pursuit of ways of reducing my heavy metal exposure.

Recently I went for my six month check-up with my NHS dentist and he identified that one of my mercury fillings was broken. I was horrified. Broken meant that it was leaking these nasties into my blood stream every time I ate or drunk anything. I needed this fixed and fast.

I chatted to him about my concerns and, while he didn’t 100% agree with them, he listened. I explained that I wanted to see a holistic dentist so that I could have a rubber dental dam fitted (this is basically a piece of rubber that fits around the tooth/teeth being worked on and covers your throat) and wear an oxygen mask for the procedure, thus reducing my exposure to chemicals. He explained that he thought this was ‘over kill’ and that sometimes when people use the word ‘holistic’ they can take advantage of a patient in pursuit of healing form a disease. I didn’t feel it was appropriate, at that point, to remind him that I use the word ‘holistic’ on a frequent basis in my business…

Our differences aside, we both shared a mutual respect for one another’s views and we both listened as we chatted through the options moving forward. I made the decision to contact a holistic dentist for the procedure of removing and replacing the broken filling and my dentist agreed to support me as an ongoing patient – I couldn’t help but notice the similarities of this to the conversation and decisions I had made alongside my oncologist when I had decided not to have chemotherapy, opting instead to peruse alternative and complementary therapies, following my cancer recurrence in December 2017.

However, despite my best intentions, getting an appointment with a holistic dentist wasn’t as straight forward as I had hoped. The waiting list was 2-3 months just for a consultation! I needed treatment faster than this to ensure that I wasn’t exposed to any more mercury and also so that my tooth didn’t become more rotten as inevitably food, and subsequent bacteria, would be getting trapped in the damaged filling. This, my dentist had carefully explained, could lead to me needing a root canal treatment; something I was not willing to accept given the vast amount of evidence indicating a connection between root cancel treatments and a later cancer diagnosis.

So I made the decision to contact my own dentist and ask him if he would do the procedure for me using a dental dam (albeit without the oxygen mask). “Of course”, came his unexpected reply. In fact, he went on to explain that this was his preference and that when he has treatments himself, he asks his dentist to use one.

I was once again surprised at the wonderful responses that can come when you honour and respect yourself and your values and speak up for your needs. I never expected this response from my dentist!

So, on Monday, I visited my dentist for the double appointment I’d been allocated (to allow extra time) and had a dental dam fitted and my filling removed and replaced. My exposure to chemicals and heavy metals was significantly reduced and I was only charged the usual NHS price for this procedure.

Following the procedure I had a lengthy chat with my dentist, quizzing him in the way my oncologist has no doubt become accustomed to. Instead of rushing me away, he took the time to discuss my dental health with me and its relation to my holistic health. I left feeling supported and informed. I was reminded that it is only by asking our questions, by raising our concerns and, essentially, by doing our own research, that we can develop the much needed respectful relationships with the people caring for us.

My dentist and I had started out as two people with very different views. Moving forward, however, we have a plan that supports both of our values and beliefs. He has agreed to replace my upper fillings using a dental dam and I have agreed to see a holistic dentist for the larger, and more complex, fillings in my lower jaw. He detailed his concerns about me having the necessary anaesthetic for these larger fillings in my lower jaw – this involves an injection next to a large artery that, if cut, can cause extensive bleeding which is less than ideal in any situation but could prove a major issue for me as I am on Avastin which can prevent blood clotting and healing. Rather than say that this is impossible, however, he gave me details of a holistic dentist that uses hypnosis to do dental procedures. Now that was an outcome I wasn’t expecting!

When I first started raising my concerns and views with my dentist and he voiced that his views were different from mine, my gut response was to walk away and never go back. I’m sure I childishly muttered something like “I need a new dentist” to my husband that evening. However, when I treated my dentist as a person and asked him to explain his views I created a dialogue that allowed him to listen to and value my views too.

As a result, I have been reminded, again, that this is the only way to move forward if we are to become holistically healthy. We won’t always have the same views as the people caring for us. Sometimes they are there to educate us, and sometimes we are there to inform them but, either way, this can only happen with mutation respect. However, walking away and seeking only people with the same views as us is not always the best answer, in fact, sometimes it may lead us to miss out on the optimal outcome….in my case a team of dentists, a saved budget and, potentially, dentistry under hypnosis to prevent bleeding (that part still feels a bit ‘eek!’)

So, I encourage you to have open discussions with the people in your health team whose views sometimes get your back up; to build a respectful relationship in which you listen to one another, even when you don’t agree; and to have an open mind about where these relationships can take you on your healing journey.

After all, isn’t this how we should view all relationships…

Love and light, Fi xx

ovarian cancer

New Gene in Ovarian Cancer

New Gene Shows Non BRCA Patients Could Have Inherited Ovarian Cancer From Their Paternal Grandmothers

This news is of great interest to me and I have been meaning to for some time…

Discovery of a new gene suggests that ovarian cancer that is not caused by a BRCA mutation may be passed on by father’s and paternal grandmothers. As a result this means that those affected are at greater risk if their paternal grandmother and sister(s) has/had ovarian cancer.

This is interesting to me because I do NOT have the BRCA gene mutation, however my paternal grandmother passed away from ovarian cancer and my cancer ‘behaves’ as if it is genetic – aggressive and responsive to treatment.

I wonder then how many of my fellow teal sisters without the BRCA gene have a paternal grandmother with ovarian cancer too? xxx

Let’s see how many of us there are….


ovarian cancer

Sickness – Ambulance – Home

Last night I took unwell at about 12.30am with severe abdominal pain which woke me up. I near crawled to the bathroom from where I was then unable to move and began constantly throwing up. After 3 hours, and knowing that abdominal pain and vomiting can be associated with an Avastin and/or OC complication, my hubby called our local hospital for advice.

After a lot of back and forth and several services refusing to treat me due to ‘a complicated medical history’ NHS24 sent an ambulance.

By the time the paramedics arrived I was lying on our bathroom floor, screaming in pain, covered in sick and I had even wet myself from the severity of my sickness and pain – once upon a time I would have been ashamed of sharing this but I think it’s important to be honest about our bodies, to not be ashamed and to show others that they are not alone.

The paramedics were exceptional. They were compassionate, caring and fortunately shared the dark sense of humour you will inevitably find in our household in these (actually, in all) situations.

They took all of my stats and then helped me into the ambulance where they inserted an IV, through which they gave me anti-sickness medication and morphine while I continued to vomit and writhe in pain.

Morning had broken by the time we arrived at the hospital and fortunately the medication had started to are affect. After thorough examination it was agreed that I had contracted food poisoning, during our celebratory dinner in Edinburgh after my good results yesterday – the irony!

I am now home and trying to rest after, literally no sleep during the night. This evening I head off to a yoga retreat for a few days and I don’t plan on missing it!

I am writing all of this for a number of reasons.

1. I think there was a waste of services used on me last night. My history may be complicated but that doesn’t mean that I don’t need care. Also, it would have been a lot cheaper for an ambulance an A&E hospital bed not to have been used.

2. I realised that while I have successfully navigated the integration of NHS and private treatment for myself, this leaves me in a vulnerable situation when I need acute care.

I am already working on how to navigate and avoid these two points in future.

3. Finally, and most importantly, I want to highlight the exceptional care of the paramedics who came to see me and also to the A&E team. In my experience, both of these services rarely get the recognition they deserve. I felt held, safe and truly cared for as an individual. Most of all, I felt listened to. In fact, when I woke an hour ago (to our little cat bring us a ‘gift’ of a live bird) I thought I had just had a vivid dream about ‘an ambulance family’ – of course, when I saw the dressing on my arm and the hospital sick bowl (or ‘free party hat’ as they had called it) by my bed I knew it had been real. However, I think it’s beautiful that they left this sense of family with me – you don’t get better care than that. Thank you xx